Monday, March 24, 2008

sum pictures that i really wanna place into my post

another ordinary Monday comes. being listless in tutorial with all mumbling friends during the discussion and time that seemed to slowly tick out made me smile in my heart that we might suppose to have more holiday. 6 days time off didn't seem enough for us to do whatsoever the things dat we wanna do actually .so, when we gotta wake up in this morning then should realize that we're gonna back to all stressing activities, we then freak on it. in sum more hours with this no-fervour , I'm now sitting again in here to post sum stuff , browsing sum journal and watch sum funny video in you tube and setting sum junk stuffs.i then evoked sum idea to put sum pics in this post.

i got amused to accept sum Mmes from mama containing my nephew 's recent pics.i then have sum idea to narrate his story through pics that're likely to perform such a metamorphosis within.here goes.my cutie nephew, rayhan valentino.he's 9 months old now anyway.



His first hour to breathe the real O2 in hospital.he might confused for the light hehe



My mama cuddled him , woooo must be so warm yah.. hehe he looked so cute , no?



He’s with her mama. He looked upset right? Haha coz his sleep time ‘s always disturbed by sum ppl who taking the pics. :P yah coz you’re super cute rayhan, no wonder everyone always wanna pester you. Hehe


When he’s still 3 months old. This is the time when I went home for a vacation. Yes, he made me adore him like hell. He’s sooooooooo cute. I cant help. Huuhu. I bet it muz be from his aunty( me actually) !

OMG!!! Doesn’t he look so gorgeous, or what?

Eh? He’s getting fattier. No comment. Hehe, but he’s still cute, right!

when he's bald





his recent pics sent a week ago. look different, no?? that's why it lemme title this naration " metamorphosis" hehe


so that's all for 1st part of this post. see again in part 2 heheh

continued......

Sunday, March 23, 2008

when the anger dominates the logics

how stressful this day was! GOD! it's like to flake and never stand again. it's such an indescribable worse situation ever when i could have sum crisis on my own self for eveything's fallen into pieces.i'm booing myself since im vaguely thinking about what i built for such a very long time with all intricacies and endeavors is stabbing me on the bottom point that hurt me too much. im juz like a cold-hearted bitch in defining what is actually happening on me which i kept neglecting what i need to feel and see for the reality. i know these words cant make sense enough when everyone reads, it's like an unnecessary thing to think about then. under all circumstances, i dun feel okay at all today. all this shame and guilt are obscuring, thumping my heart, slapping me, throwing me from the top to the beautiful trash. i shockingly realize that i'm juz a piece of crap, really, i'm nothing. how i could act so pretentious wid all satisfaction?

i'm bout to change?

it's queer transition time.

when i ate my words so often, when everyone looked me in juz an eye, when everyone think i was a pushy, when everyone byes.

when i realized how filthy this pride, when i was aware of my vanity, when i indulged myself vainly, when i was torn.

i juz need a warm hug, warm smile of everyone whom i miss.
i miss all simple thing that i used to have
i miss the tales from friends
im tired of the hives and the pressure
i miss being an angel for myself

transition time , transition time

which i should adjust and no " hang-on" no more.

transition time.. transition time
when it sumtimes would cripple me then i supposed to get stunk
when it teaches me to be a tougher one
which observes then controls me

anything's bout to change when i become a controller and deny to be a stalker for my feeling.

Friday, March 21, 2008

i can't help myself for this sickness

im terribly pissed off for having so much terribleness on my net connection. so many things drag me on lately as well that i dunno why it can happen to me. lil piece of shit which i barely bitched on is a @#@$%$ error in uploading sum pics in my friendster account, it's then followed with sum unaccomplished debating matters, followed again wid lagging internet connection, followed again with my prickling headache, followed again with a lil hunger, followed again with sleepinez , followed again with a contrary view on 'what i can do tonite should have been done soon' that seems to gimme extra burden on my head, uoooh. if i could list billions things that horibly worsen my excruciating dizziness , it muz be so much better

* sigh.
im too much complaining these minutes. i feel there's sum kinda hot solid things blended in my head that makes my brain cant be working in its gear.yes really, i cant think that clear right now.

i remember how easy my life was, when i was still in my parents's house.i always tried to share all problems with mama and dad or sum close friends that always be there when i needed sum helps.it's totally different when im now here.i now gotta finish all given stuffs alone,by myself. is it really my fault to not really believing anyone to getting rid off my stuffs ? , so , i dun care how damn hard i try to finish those stuffs as long as i do it by my own self, it's always ok. i hate cooperation that always ends up with a disappointment.

what i can read in mind is " hey i need to share my stuffs or try to have sum lil more remedies to clean up sum shits on me". alrite then. thanks for being so blunt.

oooh. is it really fatal when we're unendurable for handling too much things? is it equal enuff with vulnerability? am too i selfish to think that i'm super bright to handle so many things? is it okay when i cant help myself for this sickness? no?

when i steal 30 mins from my working time to post this blog, i dun think that it's wasting, tho. it's so ok. i feel alrite now. anything's under my control again. what my mind pushed me to do is completely true that i need to share all problems to anyone or anything.it's like to burp when we have a stomach gas problem. it will be fucking suffering when we dun do it, otherwise, it's so beautiful when we do it in the time that we really wannna.

oh shit what has this got to do with me?

Sunday, March 16, 2008

american idol fever

well, i have a new weekend activity beside cleaning up my house and watching nice cartoons in the early sunday morning, yes it is "watching the recorded american idol show" actually.. ah you may visit the official site for American idol this season at http://www.americanidol.com/ . the show remains 11 contestants to go and win the american idol. i dunno why the last elimination was sorta lame. who went back home then?? - hm david hernandez did. i think he's great singer but he's kinda lack of X factor , but for me , he's quite good at dancing hehe. i forgot what he sang for this week, but it's good enuff la, really. therefore, i have my heart broken to hear that he's eliminated. i think some other contestans sang so damn worse than him. but why should be eliminating him ? why americans vote for the worse??

here is

David Hernandez

David Hernandez!
  • Age: 24
  • Hometown: Glendale, AZ
  • Favorite Quote: "Believe it, and you'll see it. Know it and you'll be it." - Dr. Wayne W. Dyer.
  • Audition City: San Diego
  • Musical Influences: Stevie Wonder, Donnie Hathaway, Alicia Keys, Anthony Hamilton, Michael Jackson, Peabo Bryson.
  • Voted Off: 3/12/08
for the performance, we may look up http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dSnWr2S8f4g

leave him with his broken heart then.sorry. bubye.

truthfully i have fallen in love with a male contestant at the very 1st sight ( on tv actually hehe), yes he is MICHAEL JOHNS wwoooooohoooo. he's hot, nice, adorable, endearing, down to earth, unique, always be himself, special,sooo much more lovable , american sweetheart, insanely cute , ohhh i dun have anymore compliments for him, but HE"S SUPER SEXY IDOL to me. love you kiss kiss michael johns.. you blow me up ( what??) hehe.

here you are my babe johns,

Michael Johns

Michael Johns!
  • Age: 29
  • Hometown: Buckhead, GA
  • Favorite Quote: "It's better to be a has been than a never was."
  • Audition City: San Diego
  • Musical Influences: The Beatles, Neil Finn, Queen, Otis Redding,
i dun care how boring you are for other people, you are still my cutie pie hotty johns.i love you so much wid all my lung , heart, kidney , aaah all body saja lah.hehe.
for the performance, see this one : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JVQeJ23tleQ&feature=related


othe favorites are Brooke white and david cook. brooke white is very good and creative in arranging the music. her performances were always nice. David brook , OMG! he's totally rocking and cool. he always blows up everyone coz he really has a huge voice. i love it.

so here you are..

Brooke White

Brooke White!

  • Age: 24
  • Hometown: Mesa, AZ
  • Favorite Quote: "Shower the people you love with love!" - James Taylor
  • Audition City: Philadelphia, the city of brotherly love!
  • Musical Influences: The GOOD stuff - James Taylor, Carole King, Fleetwood Mac, Elton John, Stevie Wonder, Eagles, America, Carly Simon, Bee Gees, Hall & Oats, Joni Mitchell, Bonnie Raitt.

David Cook



David Cook!

  • Age: 25
  • Hometown: Blue Springs, MO
  • Favorite Quote: "Pain don't hurt." - Patrick Swayze in "Roadhouse"
  • Audition City: Omaha
  • Musical Influences: Our Lady Peace, Big Wreck.
overall, all contestants are good enuff then. but for this week, it's all i can tell. see later whether or not im gonna have my mind change.

Friday, March 14, 2008

watching gossip infotaiment + taking pics = special quality time with sis

having super busy time in campus and other activities makes me and my sis actually can't spend a good time together.so, it's really rare for us both to have such a special quality time to spend. the definition of daily life for us has recently been change. wakin up in different time in the morning, preparing all stuffs by own self, coming to different department building( it's still adjescent, tho hehe, so near , medical one is next to dentistry) , coming back home in different time as well, then working all stuffs by self, goin to bed, then waking up again in different time in the morning, so forth = definition of daily life. we dun say that we're lack of communication, but we're lack of time to juz feel that it is really really special to spend together. we go shoping and go eating in cozy places often, but sumtimes, inside our heart we're actually not in our quality time.

in this afternoon, i dunno why , we laughed alot while watching gossip infotainment. it's really funny to watch sumone clarified dat he's not gay in all the way , but other confessed he's gay. ana again sumone told dat her indescent pics aint a big problem for morality , and other said she respected east culture too much. so many things happening toward indonesia's celebrity, it's like a circus to me and they all seem to be a joke to me for sort. hehe. another damn weird thing is on the presenter. really , i hate the way they speak like insane. they juz monyong monyong on the cam , and exaggerating everything. totally lame !! hate hate hate la..

and, sum other nite, we felt nice to take sum cuties pics. check em out .. then say the reality dat we're absolutely insanely cute.hehe

laz nite , we're obsessed of ourselves

i told you that we're incredibly cute haha

okie then. sisters for life......!!

hope we can hv sum more special quality time later on ...

what makes people fall in love?

i got such a good knowledge which's transfered by naked science this afternoon.the issue was WHAT'S SEXY? ,but the major scrutinized thing was on how people can fall in love and couple up each other and how we're obviously designed by our DNA and sum triggered neurotransmitter from sum released hormones called dophamine and oxytocin to love and stick on sumone. it's like a super scientific explanation bout the process in one's body when she/he is in love. it's definitely right that we're likely to have sum chemistry of love within our head, our brain, our body when we start hooking up and having sum contact wid sumone we like. it's really CHEMISTRY then.

well, When we first fall in love, the neutrophins in our hormone are raised substantially longer to continuing relationships. For male hormones dophamine is heavily secreted during the period of 'falling in love'. And a chemical called 'b-Phenylethylamine' is released in our brain that triggers the passion in love. Some study revealed dat it's to enable humans to form 'family unit' in order to reduce off-spring mortality rate, therefore the extention of their own DNA.

And again, when we're in love we muz have our oxytocin increased. from medical term, oxytocin is a hormone of the posterior pituitary gland that is the principally used in obstetrics to induce uterine contractions. but, it's not only to induce uterine contraction, but also actually involves in the process of love's chemistry as this released hormone may work in Sexual arousal, bonding, Increasing trust and reducing fear and also increasing feelings of love, empathy and connection to others.

see, when we're in love , it aint only it, but there's a tough chemistry within our body. how we could feel it's so simple ?? falling in love aint surely as simple as we think then.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

UOOOHH MAGELANGAN..

Here I go again.whew yogyakarta’s getting hotter and the weather is uncontrollable. It’s really like a hell during day ,so much hot and rain during afternoon and nite or even reverses, raining all day long and no raining at all at nite, confusing right? . an issue pops out of my head since Im terribly confused on why everyone;s not aware of GLOBAL WARMING WHICH should be a concern these days. They come up with so many reason to only justify what they think about Global warming, and it’s negative, but sum more crap facts is they realize Global warming is happening, theY do feel the effect but ,again, they keep neglecting the green action. Such a sorry fact we have. On my mind, if only I could wake them up with such a creepy concert or discussion which i attempt to persuade them with sum heart-shaking words and creepy-weepy-face ,shout out “ PEOPLE PLEASE DO GREEN ACTION BY TODAY. THE EARTH’S GONNA DRY , THE EARTH’S GONNA EXPLODE , OUR GENERATION WILL COLLAPSE OR WE WILL NOT EVEN SEE OUR CUTE CHILDREN LIVING HEALTHY SINCE 89% OF THEM SUFFER FROM BOMBASTIC-POLUTION-CAUSED DISEASE OR AGAIN IN SUM MORE YEARS YOU WILL SEE PARIS HILTON GOT SKIN CANCER !UOHHH! PEOPLE, PLEASE RISE YOUR HAND SPIRITFULLY AND STRAIGHT, SCREAM YOUR HEART OUT PEOPLE, STOP GLOBAL WARMING!! AYEEEEE FOR GREEN ACTION!! Whew, such a fantastic idiot imagination I made hehe. Whatever, it’s for our goodnez hehe. and today. i had sum worst-lunch-career ever. why it's so????? see the chronology below

1.it's about 12 pm when i left the lab then ran through the canteen. i felt no idea where i should flatten my ass off to having my nice lunch as it's so full anywhere, all seats were almost occupied. but thanks god, after squeezing for the seats, i had sum lil space to sit then. yippiiii ( these minutes, i didnt feel any bad feeling or intuition)

2. the day was so much hot!!!! sun exposure was getting mad. i had my skin tanned by sum pricklin heat. i hate this moment so much ... really for the sake of heaven.

3. i then ordered sum new menu which sounds so interesting by the name - MAGELANGAN- ( still didnt feel anything on it, it's my very first time to order MAGELANGAN anyway)

4. it'd been more than 40 minutes waiting. the sun was still burning the skin

5. getting pissed off with a close friend. she ordered MAGELANGAN as well. we both couldnt stop coming to the waiters to ask if our MAGELANGAN already done yet.

6. F******* up. why it's so late ! we gotta go to the next class in 15 minutes

7. 20 minutes later, our MAGELANGAN served. i was damn shocked about the fact that shook my heart! OMG!! MAGELANGAN IS JUZ THE COLLABORATION BETWEEN whatever FRIED RICE AND FRIED NOODLE ! T.T see the picture

this is MAGELANGAN , the colaboration between NASI GORENG AND MI GORENG .. UOOOOOOHH GW KETIPU....

8. i cried in my heart. gosh why it was it. i waited this MAGELANGAN for about 1 hour and it didnt pay off at all!! wanna know how it tasted? it's completely messy. how couldnt you cry for this kinda thing eh?? huhuhuhuhuhu

9. i didnt finish my lunch as we were very late for the class and i do solemnly swear that i never wanna finish that MAGELANGAN. really , better to not eating it at all.believe me . if you juz did order it, please dun expect too much about the taste, unlez your apetite is totally destructed or you dun eat anything for 11 days.

10. we left the canteen with all thoze craps, crying in heart, and damning the prickling heat on our skin for all over again.

11. we promise and compromise to ourselves that we never order MAGELANGAN again. '

please forget this shit please

OKIE.. sum other issue for this week is... MAKING OF SPACE MAINTAINER.
space maintainer is a part of dentistry stuff dat's destined and function to maintain the space in dentition.other function is to prevent the malocclusion and malposition of the teeth. whew.
it's like a group of sum ortho wire components, such, labial arch , adam clasp, artificial teeth and lingual arch. do you think it's so fine to me??????? oh BIG NO.
i always have sum problems in making ortho wire. i failed the skill test in block 8 juz due to the ugly ortho wire i made.so for now, the prediction is FAIL Again. huhu.
after getting through so many hurts on thumbs and other fingers, after crying and whining up for bit while,after assuming that i wouldnt be good at clinical juz coz of this disability, after promising self that i wouldnt become ortho specialist in my futur clinic, after so much more unstopable efforts , EVENTUALLY....... I MADE UP . im so much happy........... yipppppiiiiieeeeeeeee... it aint that ugly then
nice, no??? hehe im proud of mine...really

i felt nice then.. hehe. so the message that may convey us is nothing's impossible. keep doing the best eventho you have to kill yourself for sort hehe.

Monday, March 10, 2008

boredom +self-excluding = crap! ( aging part 1)

OMG!! i think i found myself having sum new wrinkles since yesterday! it's like a darning thing to have when you feel so Oh-in-love-like-mad and proud of your skin very much that you then keep avoiding the UV ( which is unfortunately inevitable,hm at least we do reduce the exposure hehe, positive positive ..) and the worse is, being anxious about "AGING' all the time and it seems to always take your breath away when you find sum wrinkle under your eyes or around forehead and your lips (what i have now is not like as terrible as this one hehe, much luckier , though hehe , but still !!! it's DISASTER), then next, you can stop WHATing up and Bitching on the reflection within the mirror which is you yourself actually inside. back to my problem again, i scrutinize again what makes thz damn wrinkles can beautifully lies on sum part on my face. i have an idea then, oh F*** UP! i watched badminton match ( ALL ENGLAND for sure) lately! gyaaaaaaaa!. i could feel i moaned like a bitch then harder to breathe when the match getting tougher and hottier, i could feel i screamed and yelled like insane when the opponent of my favorite or my country got the sum more points, and again, i could feel i thought too much about the match that i could hardly sleep. oh mama, and this morning i found sum wrinkles on my cutie face. sum ppl humble it up, but i cant! i'm bound to be so worried, despites the wrinkle is juz millimeters appeared.

is it really then the sport matches can lead you to your earlier aging???? if it's so, i have to heal!! ( aww i believe thiz wrinkle is filthy and pathologically suffering as it's too much shaking my heart). but, before we're so attached wid this self-excluding , we oughta figure out the truth ... hmm is it really?? let's find out people,...

this is how i look like.
18 YO but looks like 20 sumthing YO ..hehe. early aging???


more cases? more facts ?

Aging of the Face

A stranger who wants to know another person's age can either ask for identification or look at the person's face, and the latter is less intrusive and almost as accurate. People are able to determine age from the face with surprising accuracy, to within a few years when the person judged is between 20 and 60, a skill that develops early in life when even babies can distinguish children from adults.

How the Face Ages

immature facial features mature: wrinkles, blemishes, changed positions
The signs of age in the face are clear in this contrast:
expansion of the eye, nose and mouth features to fill
a greater area of the cranium; less forehead and more
chin; changes in hair, skin color and texture, pores open
and wrinkles increase.

As the face matures, it changes some of its most enduring properties (e.g., shape of cranium) and acquires new attributes (e.g., wrinkles). These changes are the basis for information about the aging of the face. The greatest changes occur from infancy to puberty as the face and head mature into an adult form. The eyes, nose, and mouth features of the face expand to fill a relatively greater area of the surface of the cranium; the relative area occupied by the forehead shrinks as the eyes move up into this area; the eyes become proportionately smaller and the forehead slopes back more; the face becomes smaller in respect to the rest of the body; and the chin tends to become larger and more protrusive. Some of these changes may continue, but less dramatically, into adulthood, but other changes begin to occur to mark aging of the face and correspond to the decline of the face past the generative years into old age. The skin becomes darker, less flexible, rougher, and more leathery; lines, wrinkles, folds, pouches, and blemishes or discolorations gradually appear and/or become more pronounced; muscles and connective tissues change their elasticity; and fatty deposits and bone may be lost to produce pouches in the cheeks, bags under the eyes, sagging under the chin or a double chin, opening of pores, and other changes in the way soft tissues conform to the underlying bony structure. Changes in the vascular supply of the skin and in hair, oil and sweat glands usually occur. These changes are illustrated in the images on the right above. There are also changes in the movements and behaviors of the face as it ages, but little is known about these changes because they require a long research period to study. During aging of the face, fine control of the facial muscles is lost, similar to finger dexterity.

Continuity of Identity Through the Ages

4: aging of the face 18: facial identity 32: is preserved 50: despite wrinkling and 73: other signs of age
4 18 32 50 73

Despite the often dramatic changes in the face as it ages, the identity of the face is preserved throughout the person's life. The elements of facial identity of each person can be detected from early childhood through old age, though it may be difficult to match a face using only the extremes of age, versus seeing the steps as the face develops and ages. The series of images at the right show the same woman at different ages, indicated in years below each image. The images show the effects of facial aging on facial appearance. There is a resemblance from age to age that can be seen even between the youngest and oldest image. Humans interpret this consistency in the appearance of the face as part of facial identity and the identity of the person.



What To Do About Wrinkles


Wrinkles indicate age, and particularly for women, are seen as problematic for beauty and worth eliminating, if possible. One reason for minimizing wrinkling is that youthful women are generally viewed as more attractive by men. The best way to deal with wrinkles is to prevent or postpone them for as long as possible. One of the most important wrinkle preventatives is to avoid sunlight because the sun's rays penetrate the skin surface and physically destroy tissues of the skin, which leads to wrinking. If you seek a tan in the sun, you will without doubt pay for it later with earlier, deeper wrinkles. Tanning is caused by the sun stimulating production of melanin as a protective response against sunburn. Both tanning and burning are separate from the damage that occurs to deeper layers of skin tissues, which is caused by a different ultraviolet bandwidth. Sun screen products are generally ineffective in preventing this type of damage. Although darker skin types are less vulnerable to sunburn (though not immune), their response to the wrinkling action of the sun is not significantly different. If you must have a darker skin color, tanning spas may have lamps that do not emit the damaging rays (carefully evaluate this claim - they are not the burning rays that damage deep skin tissues), and there are pills and topical lotions that dye the skin to resemble a suntan. These alternatives will save the tan seeking woman many regrets over skin care.

Another recommended preventative approach to skin care is to eat a good diet that provides adequate nutrients for maintaining skin health, which can be supplemented with a multi-vitamin or specific vitamins for the skin. Vitamins that are claimed to have beneficial effects for skin health include A, C, D, and E. However, scientific evidence for the specific actions of these vitamins taken in supplemental doses for skin health (beyond their general antioxidant effect) is sparse.

Once you have wrinkles, there are some techniques for reducing them. Recently introduced creams and lotions are effective in reducing wrinkles. These wrinkle creams act by increasing the volume of tissue cells and smoothing out the wrinkle or line. Thus, they cannot eliminate deep wrinkles. See your physician or pharmacist when buying these creams because only some skin care creams and lotions have this action. The other, ordinary skin care cosmetic products may or may not help smooth your wrinkles, and generally act by covering or hiding them.

The face lift is a proven effective cosmetic surgery treatment for wrinkles, pouches, bags, and sagging skin. You should have severe wrinkling to warrant this expensive and drastic step. The surgeon literally pulls the skin tighter on the bones of the face. Because the skin continues to age, the signs of age will eventually return and another face lift will be needed. However, the elasticity of the skin decreases with age and its ability to respond well to the lift also decreases, so signs of multiple lifts eventually negatively affect aesthetic judgments of the face. Careful selection of physician is an obvious consideration for such a procedure; fortunately, this lucrative field attracts many competent cosmetic surgeons.

Recently, botox injections have become popular as a treatment for wrinkles. Botox is a inoffensive name for botulinum toxin, one of the most deadly biochemicals known, and a potential weapon in a future terrorist attack. Is this poison something you want to inject into your face without a highly compelling reason? If your answer is yes, then there are additional facts to keep in mind. This toxin acts by blocking neurotransmitters to the muscle, thus blocking muscular contraction. The blocking action has important medical uses for seriously ill people, and also has the side effect of reducing wrinkles that are the product of chronically tense or frequently contracted muscles. Since these muscles no longer contract (or are partially paralyzed), the wrinkles they produce are minimized. Thus, only wrinkles that are produced or enhanced by muscular actions are mitigated by botox; other wrinkles, lines and folds that are not primarily a product of muscle contractions will not be affected. Also, if the muscles that produce wrinkles also produce important functional actions that botox cannot be allowed to interfere with, such as movements of the lips, botox use is unwise. Thus, the primary site for using botox is around the eyes where loss (or partial loss) of muscular action will not cause functional problems. There are other practical problems in using botox as a wrinkle reducer. Its effects last only a matter of months, so subsequent treatments are required to restore its effects. Also, the body develops antibodies to it that reduce its effectiveness, necessitating stronger doses or more frequent treatments. If a person who has a resistance to botox someday needs it for serious medical purposes, the medical application may be thwarted. Overall, perhaps it would be better to seek treatment for the underlying condition that causes tense facial muscles.

gyaaaaaaaaaaa!!! got it ?? *shaking head means dunno*
okie then .. i will learn more bout the wrinkles later on hehe, but i now still believe that there SPORT MATCH can fasten the aging , the wrinkles hauler hehe since i THINK i do experience it ( is it right?? only heaven knows??)



WHATA N0- SCIENTIFIC KNOWLEDGE AND EVIDENCE THIS BLOG MADE UP!!

Saturday, March 8, 2008

wooden heart

Im now sitting here in netcafe for bit while. it's obviously unintended for my sis pushed me to go online. i' m kinda bored then since i dun have any purpose to come hehe. it's not like last night, i came OL juz wanna have a very great quality time wid a fren whom i always miz to talk wid, yes im addicted to him actually , i dunno why. whenever he told me sumthing that everyone mite say it's not really special and touching, i feel so good and special tho, and sumtime i think too much, hence the meaning on me perhaps beyond what he supposed to say and mean , it's weird rite? i think and feel too much about him.


i dunno what my mood is rite now. everything's so boring. i sumtimes have my mind walking to remember and recall things that i used to do to distract everything from the boredom. anything but so simple and affordable like taking the nap, crying till falling down asleep, or telephoning sum girl friends to demanding the hot gossips ( yes, it's juz for unconditional situation like stuckin my head in the shit boredom , like this hehe, for another time i dun do it, believe me , dun look dat way hehe), and playing everything on pc eventho i dun need them worked or played for only irritating my eyes in the end.hehe. well, they're juz so last years, tho i still do sum sumtimes. but actually i have my new remedy for solving and getting away the sickness and shit on me. it's reliable for sure,that it is taaaaa-dddddaaaaaaaaaaa MY NEW BIKE!. i feel so much crush with my bike too much too alot as if i have got my dream car or getting holiday trip to sum wonder land. i play with it every morning when goin to campus and every afternoon when having time off, that i feel so damn nice as i can let my brain breathe dat good and i can play (sumtime it seems to break) every lil pieces of bones in my body coz of the movement, and at least i dun really worry bout my weight-reducing program ( in spite of i dunno it works yet hehe) what i wanna admit is juz i love my poligon bike soooo much like hell.( too much, no?? o.O)

im now playing a very classic song by elvis p, tittled wooden heart. hmm i dun really notice and get what the lyric tries to tell, i think for the term of wooden heart itself, it's telling how wooden our heart is as it's juz so vulnerable to b broken by sum irresponsible ppl (im mumbling actually please dun take it personally). well i dun care, im not there.

ritey then. i do keep bitching my boring stuffs like mad , before i turn off like bastard, better to go heehe. whata weird nite i have